Bunbury overnight run February 2006

2006 sees 'Paradise Lost' entering its second year as Australia's premier scooter club, if we do say so ourselves. What started out as a bunch of mates getting together for a ride, beers and tinkering & fettling really has turned into a monster club with over 30 members.

The momentum of the club has been building steadily over the past 6 weeks or so, as the weekend approached this seemed to be dying back a bit with lots of people unable to attend the excellent Bunbury run. (my favourite event of 2005). with absolutely no idea how many were going to front I was still pleasantly surprised to see 8 scooters prepared to make the effort. if only we knew what the weather had in store for us it would have been a completely different story, I'm sure.

Still, Saturday morning has arrived and Rich, Gaz and myself leave Vic Park and head off to Freo, excited and very thirsty. We meet up with Bolty, Rocket, Dean, Brenton, the rinser foursome and the saint who has come down to wave us off. After a bit of hanging around chewing the fat we depart for the first rest point, Shell petrol station in South Freo. Rich almost comes to blows with the teller after pushing into the queue and then realizing he doesn't have any cash to pay for his water. He then went complains about the price as he storms out, err, you didn't pay for it Rich? In the meantime Dean is doing laps around the forecourt trying to work out his tyre pressures.

We leave the petrol station and head to Rockingham where we are due to hook up with man u Jim, Fodes and the Rockingham lot. As we approach the sky turns black, it could have been 'good Friday' I swear. The heavens open and down it comes and I mean it came. Talk about long odds, what's the chances of a torrential downpour in February in the middle of bleedin summer? Bolty, if we had put some cash on it we would have cleaned up mate. We take shelter under a local deli awning and Bolty decides to give everyone a cheap thrill by getting his tits out. After me confusing everyone with my complete lack of knowledge of the Rockingham area <thanks Pete> we arrive at t' pub, 'George and Dragon'.

We've already picked up Jim and his whipper snapper but the Rocky crew are nowhere to be seen, the rain had obviously scared them off. Undeterred we push on for Mandurah. The 'power' boys leave me and Gaz in their wake and we really are struggling in the wet. 

We pull into the Shell petrol station, where even the bikies aren't keen on venturing out. By this time we are completely sodden and getting pissed off with it. Rocky Rob's son turns up to say 'hello', so we ring him and abuse him for not fronting! A huge thank you to Jim for sticking with us in his van just in case someone carked it. In fact Jim stayed with Gary and myself all the way to Bunbury, which must be a first, an excellent back up. (Put's International Rescue to shame.)  As I start to hallucinate with visions of freezing cold pints at the Brighton Hotel, Mandurah couldn't have come any quicker.

Gary and I arrive with Jim as the sun comes out. I spend 10 minutes wringing out my socks and the front of the pub looks like a Chinese laundry with wet clothes hanging from any vantage point trying to dry out a bit in the sun. After some beers and a bit of food we head off for Bunbury, its already 2.30pm. After leaving Mandurah we come to a grinding halt again as Rich has left his credit card behind the bar at the Brighton pub, could have been dangerous!!! No problem, he returns in 5 minutes with funds intact. Freo to Mandurah, 4 hours. so heads down arses up for 100 k's, its a solid run down, again me and Gaz left in the wake, but no probs this time, we just want to get there. about 25 k's out of Bunbury I hit reserve which really baffles me as i had filled up in Mandurah? But hey that's scootering, anything can happen and usually does! 

We approach the Shell just out of Bunbury where the brothers/sisters are waiting for us, I cant believe it, as I turn into the service station driveway I run out of fuel and coast to the bowser. talk about lucky. By this time its gettin' on for 5 o'clock and we head to the caravan park <excellent> only to find that the office is closed!!!

Wayne and Oxo have turned up in the meantime and its nice to see smiling friendly faces after such a shitty ride. the receptionist appears, a bit like the shopkeeper in Mr Benn, "oh, I didn't think you were coming so I cancelled the booking" After explaining what had happened weather wise she manages to squeeze us in, which was a load of bollocks as we basically had an area the size of the "Walkers Stadium" (no comments please), to ourselves.

After 'pitching our tents' phnarr phnarr, we head off to Wayne and Karina's gaff for a feed and beers. These two stalwarts deserve a medal each, absolutely fantastic effort and very much appreciated by all. The next time you're in Perth you can have a nite out on the club. Again, thank you very much.

We arrange to meet up at a local club 'Barbados' later on and we head back to the caravan park for a quick scrub up. By this stage I've finished off a hip flask of Chivas, had about 4 pints and a few bottles at Wayne's and I'm feeling pretty 'merry' so merry in fact that its well over an hour until Bolty points out I've got my shirt on inside out! and I've been wondering why everyone's sniggering? Oh well, it all makes for entertainment value. A quick trip to the toilet sorts that problem out. Next stop Ferguson's where we believe that the Arsenal/Bolton game is on Fox. Not true, so Bolty, Rich and myself head to the 'Lord Forrest' where it is on. I stay for all of 30 seconds as its as lively as a morgue. 

By this time I really am quite smashed and I think my luck's changed as I'm approached by a cracking crew who want to 'rub my head', no problem. it turns out they all work at the local radio station and I go onto rant and rave about 'PLSC' etc. they look bored to tears and I've blown it. From that point on i don't remember anything until being woken up by 'PLSC's phantom snorer. talk about annoying!!! I thought after the comments at York that he/she may have had corrective surgery to fix the problem. If you are aware that you have nasal flap slap then please make alternative sleeping arrangements if attending an overnight event, otherwise you run the high risk of having your nostrils sealed with Loctite. I will be checking with partners in the future!!!

As I peer from the tent, I notice that Dean is off  on another pre dawn raid, and that's the last we see of him. After a much needed shower and sssssssh*T it's pack up time as i need to be home by 1pm and the thought of another 7 hour ride is depressing.

We split into two groups for the journey home, the rinsers, Jimmy and Brenton head back to Wayne's for bacon butties and to meet up with Bolty, Rocket, Rich & Gaz and I 'hit the north' its an uneventful ride back barr the rather irritating rattle coming from Gaz's cylinder cowl, not good with a banging headache, problem solved with a cable tie. We stop at Mandurah for a drink. So run number 6 comes to a conclusion, i have attended all of them and this time is no different.

Top people, top scooters, top venue top craic. Again a massive thankyou to Wayne, Karina and Jim. See you ALL at Lancelin.

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the Anorak
ridden not kiddin'

Editor's note: Ade has asked me to point out, that the above has been edited. You can ask him what bits were removed.